Teen Dating Violence

In the past, relationship violence was primarily seen as an adult problem. However, in recent years, teens have started to speak out, revealing that they experience a similar range of violence in their lives, including sexual harassment, assault, and physical abuse. 

The types and extent of abuse in teen relationships are comparable to that of adult intimate partner violence. Relationship violence among adolescents, teens, and young adults is just as dangerous as it is among adults. Children who grow up in homes of violence often become aggressive outside the home. This behavior is further supported by the overwhelming violence in our culture as seen in the media and on the streets, making it difficult to break the cycle. Simultaneously, violence and trauma at home undermine a child’s sense of personal power, increasing the likelihood of them becoming victims of a violent partner.

“any type of verbal, emotional, physical, or sexual abuse that occurs between two people identified as being in a dating relationship”

Warning Signs and Red Flags

  • Extreme Jealousy

  • Controlling Behavior

  • Quick Involvement

  • Unrealistic Expectations and Dependencies

  • Isolating you from others

  • Blaming

  • Hypersensitivity

  • Cruelty to Animals

  • Forcing or Pressuring Physical Intimacy

  • Abrupt Mood Swings

  • Checking your phone or media accounts without permission

  • Threats

  • Breaking or Throwing Objects

  • Any Physical Harm

Danger Signals

  • Your partner is possessive and extremely jealous, frequently calling to check up on you throughout the day.

  • They lack personal interests and goals, relying heavily on the relationship and becoming increasingly involved in your life.

  • They discourage your outside interests and friendships, attempting to isolate you from family and friends.

  • They dictate your activities and schedule, seeking total control over what you do and when.

  • They struggle with communication and are unwilling or unable to resolve conflicts verbally.

  • Their violent behavior escalates when they consume alcohol or drugs.

A healthy relationship is one in which

  1. Individuals completely respect each other.

  2. Individuals give, receive, and compromise equally.

  3. Individuals value one another and accept each other as they are, without attempting to change one another.

  4. Individuals support and encourage each other's goals and ambitions.

  5. Individuals trust each other and recognize jealous or controlling feelings, working through them in a healthy manner.

  6. Neither individual fears the other.

  7. Individuals communicate openly and honestly, feeling safe to express themselves.

  8. Individuals share responsibility in decision-making.

  9. Individuals encourage each other to have friends and engage in activities outside of the relationship.

  10. Individuals feel free to be themselves within the relationship.

Components of Healthy Relationships

  • Communication

  • Compromise

  • Commitment

  • Compatibility

  • Consideration (Respect)

  • Conduct

Relationship Bill of Rights

  • I have the right to be treated in a way that makes me feel safe and respected

  • I have the right to say NO and not feel guilty

  • I have the right to change my mind

  • I have the right to express my feelings as long as I am not violating others in the process

  • I have the right to be independent and have interests and friends outside of my relationship